Artistic Soul Retold

You once told me that I had the most beautiful artistic soul.
One you've never seen before in your life until you met me.
Your eyes found their way to my poetry, words filled with my emotions.
Telling stories of how much I loved a boyfriend or how he broke me in two.
Each piece I wrote painted many vivid pictures in your mind.
Always either bringing a smile to your face or a frown to your lips.
All the while, I was secretly dying on the inside from you reading my heart.

'Cause each time I picked up a pen to begin to write, my life was on the line.
Expressing my fears and happiness I kept locked behind this small smile of mine.
The same one that I use to fool the world into believing I'm just perfectly fine.
When on the inside I was always crying my sorrow away of not being deep in love.
Since all I ever wanted in this life was a man I can give my heart to hold in his hands.

I've spent many nights sitting here in front of this computer listening to music in my ears.
Writing out another fantasy I had tucked away in the back of my mind involving you.
Giving you the lead role to each poem I wrote while a little bit of my soul cracked.
'Cause once again here was another piece that was based on you and how I felt.
What I had wished to happen between us was only in the land of fantasy I reside in.
Knowing full well that in the real world, you'd never look at me twice even by chance.
But I didn't want you to know that, even if your eyes kept on reading piece after piece.

'Cause each time I picked up a pen to begin to write, my heart was on the line of breaking.
I was always afraid of what you'll say to me once you found out that you were my obsession.
My object of desire, the man that I wanted to hold my heart and future in his very hands.
So I tried my best not to be too specific when it came to you, but was rather difficult to do.
Since as a writer, I had to use every one of my senses to tell a story within these emotional lines.
So please forgive me for using you in this way, my heart wouldn't stop screaming your name.

I'm just a poet, the master of sadness and making people cry with every sad story I have to tell.
Each one ending the same way with my heart and soul crumbling from depression suffocating me.
But to you, it was nothing more than just a beautiful artistic soul shining in the darkness of love.
A strong individual going against the odds in this battle, picking myself back up each time I fell.
Moving forward even when I had tears streaming from these brown eyes used to light of the sun.
So watch me write another piece of poetry to entertain your eyes and mind, take a piece of my heart.
Even if I'm still scared to admit how much I wanted you to be one of the reasons I continued to write.

You once told me that I had the most beautiful artistic soul you've ever seen with your eyes.
One that you've never met before in your life until I came along and became entangled with you.
Poem after poem, story after story your eyes have read my works and thought how deep they were.
But you wouldn't know that half of them were about you when every time I kept painting pictures.
Portraits of boyfriends who held my heart or broke my heart each time they walked out of my door.
And you too, were one of the people to walk out of my life even if my artistic soul still yearns for you...

Written on: 9/5/11