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—a found poemHow to Sit at a Computer

How to Smile
How to Reach a Consensus
How to Remove Bloodstains from Clothing
How to Love Learning about Things
How to Tell People You’re Keeping Your Maiden Name
How to Call Bolivia
How to Believe in God
How to Make a Wedding ToastHow to Survive without Cooking
How to Enjoy Arizona All Year Long
How to Treat Dehydration
How to Get Rid of Black Circles under Your Eyes
How to Avoid Marriage and Other Committed Relationships
How to Choose a Wedding Chapel in Gatlinburg, Tennessee
How Not to Always Talk about the Same Things

How to Ignore People
How to Find Cat Urine with a UV Light
5+ Tips for Boiling Water
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
How to Control Perfectionism

How to Buy Cruelty-Free Makeup
How to Practice Nonviolent Communication
How to Win a Street Fight
How to Stop Being Needy

How to Be Popular
How to Be Confident
How to Be Attractive
How to Make a Meal Plan for One

How to Be Your Own Valentine
How to Buy Tablecloths for Your Wedding
How to Choose a Pencil
5+ Reasons You’re a Control Freak

How to Perform Self-Hypnosis
How to Survive a Freestyle Rap Battle
How to Escape Materialism and Find Happiness
How to Live on Minimum Wage
How to Raise Your Leg up to Your Head
How to Survive Federal Prison
How to Survive a Fall through Ice
How to Call in Sick When You Just Need a Day Off
How to Detect Lies
How to Have a Perfect Marriage

How to Do Nothing
How to Buy Nothing
How to Be Thankful
How to Be Busy
How to Relax When Relaxation Techniques Don’t Work
How to Do It Yourself
How to Stop Excuses
How to Recognize a Manipulative or Controlling Relationship
How to Know When You’re Hungry