Lymphoma

Lymphoma

The road that brought me here
was paved with breasts that would not lactate
and the skeletons of two
who wore the skin of men
without the memory
The road that brought me here
was paved with broad nutmeg
scented kitchens
lime gelatin
yeast
and laughing/crying/bitching women
The road that brought me here
was paved with stained glass
cathedral horns and dubious reflection
I mean this is how you found me cancer
Hat cocked to the side
cigarette dangling between your foul lips
This is how you found me
Hook in my mouth
Fish belly turned inside out
Drowning in my own sacrificial blood
Untreated and unloved
Unhailed and unheld
and most tragic of all
Uninformed
Sinister guru
You are the crooked stick at the crossroads of life
Teaching me the erection dance of spirit
How to gather and knit my own spine
How to grease my own soul with grace
And the road that will take me there
will ooze with my passion for feminine sacrament
Clean water blessed by the Goddess
of summer mornings
And I will retire in indigo wrinkles
and the faded steam of fulfilled dreams
Wedding the earth in a dust storm of faith
Remembered mostly
because I refused for so long
to die