I'm not sick but I'm not well

by Janet Kuypers

I'm not sick but I'm not well
and I'm sure there's something I can do about this
I've popped the aspirin
the tylenol
the ibuprofen
the codine
the prozac
the sleeping pills
and that thermometer is down my throat
and I'm gagging

I'm not sick but I'm not well
the doctors find nothing wrong with me
and believe me, they've taken the x-rays
they've striped me down
and made me wear one of those awful paper robes
and they've felt me up
and checked me out
and found what they were looking for
but didn't find anything I was looking for

I'm not sick but I'm not well
and I can't help but think
that everything I'm doing to make things better
might only be making things worse
so I don't want to listen to what
you have to say anymore
and I want this IV out of my arm
and I want this oxygen tube out from my nose
and I want this suppository out of my ass
and I want you to get that scalpel away from me
because I want everything I've got

I'm not sick but I'm not well
and they want me if they can keep me in line
and they want me if they can cut me open
and take out my insides
and suck out the fat
and suck out the life
and make me generic
and make me dependent
make me unreal
make me not whole
and I've walked that line with all you doctors
and I want all my parts back
and I want to be healthy

no, I'm not sick and maybe I'm not well
but you're only making me worse
I don't have the answers but neither do you
so instead of tearing me apart
and dissecting me
and studying the bones
let me just stay together for a while
until I figure it all out




Janet Kuypers's picture

ABOUT THE POET ~
Professional performance artist and publisher Janet Kuypers (http://www.janetkuypers.com) is a writer & photographer (and also a minister), editing 2 literary magazines while running Scars Publications (http://scars.tv), publishing magazines, books & CDs. She has 70+ books published (poetry, prose, novels, art), sung in 3 bands, and her CD releases (40+ in 2010) appear at iTunes & other online vendors., Kuypers has been profiled in such magazines as Nation and Discover U, won the award for a Poetry Ambassador and was nominated as Poet of the Year. She has also been highlighted on radio stations, has also appeared on national and local television repeatedly, and ran two Internet radio stations (2005-2009)., She has performed spoken word and music across the country, including in a show at the Albuquerque Spoken Word Festival during the National Poetry Slam, as well as a climactic feature at the 2006 Society of Professional Journalism Expo's Chicago Poetry Showcase; her bands have had concerts in Chicago and Alaska; in 2003 she hosted and performed at her weekly poetry and music open mike "Sing Your Life ". Starting in 2010 Janet Kuypers also hosts "the Cafe" weekly Chicago poetry open mike (http://www.chaoticarts.org/thecafe), with weekly poetry video and pod casts.


Last updated August 18, 2011