I Get Lonely

You heard from a friend
that I get lonely, or more accurately
my mother died and she did
I tell you via text. I’m sorry you say

and I don’t say you didn’t kill her,
but instead think of you gripping
our dicks in the early-evening bedroom.
Look me in the eye you said

knowing my own shame was a turn-on
(sometimes I remember it and come
on the floor in the yellow bathroom).
I’d like one more night together

I wish you’d say, but you and the man
you live with are working really
really hard on your relationship,
it has its challenges.